When I tell people Lemmy is like the old internet, I’m going to use this specific comment chain to demonstrate it.

I actually came to the comments to see if we had this information! Thanks.

This was the one I was coming to add. It gets stuck in my head for weeks.

Me and my clone will be allies. I don’t know if we could get along well enough to cohabitate, but we would definitely help each other.

I often shape and paint my nails and these things chip polish like nothing, so I’ll use the teaspoon I have lying out from the last time I made tea, probably.

So again I’m basing this on myself. I think a healthy relationship doesn’t necessarily require a lot of personal change. It requires healthy communication, it requires healthy compromise, but if you’re compatible (and something of this comes with the maturity to understand who you are and what your needs are, versus your wants) then you can fit together well with the right person without needing to change who you are.

And I don’t love the pairing of the concept of growing (as a person) to growing to be something, or someone, who fits someone else. When I grow as a person it’s learning new skills or trying a new hobby, it’s growing me. Not conforming myself to someone else.

Which is a very important distinction because I grew up with a narcissist for a mother and it made me very codependent, and I essentially lost my 20s to failed relationships spent learning that it isn’t about making whoever I’m with happy, and it isn’t about making myself better to them. It’s about knowing who I am, and embracing that so I don’t enter or stay in a relationship that isn’t already a good fit.

I’m with someone now who had the same trauma. We’ve discussed these observations. We know who we both are, and we fit. And as we grow, individually, as we pursue knowledge and hobbies and help others, we communicate, we care for one another, and we continue to fit.

So again, I’m only pulling from my life experience, but I feel like anyone can settle down or find the right person. They just have to know who they are and what they want, and find someone else who knows who they are and what they want.

I have no idea what that means.

She’s only a few years younger than I am and I only just now found someone to settle down with who makes me happy. Based on that and nothing else, I think she’ll get there as long as she keeps trying.

Not to be annoying but I actually carry a nice steel thermos with me and pour anything I might drink into the thermos.

It only feels like a hassle the first time. You get a steel thermos with a steel straw and now you’re really cooking with gas.

I’m agreeing with all the people who say they don’t notice until after they’ve read a post, but I wanted to add a Yo ho! to my comment.

Are you kidding? The nails are also pirates!

My favorite example of this is when Scrubs added Dr. Grace Miller, she was literally written to be Dr. Cox, if he was a woman.

And people despised her.

My entire counterargument is the fast fashion episode. That one was brilliant.

I haven’t seen him all week because he’s been pondering his orb.

You’ll have to try harder to dox me, agent!

I die in a conflict where I tell a Wizards of the Coast zombie that Paizo and Pathfinder are the best, which, honestly, I should’ve seen coming.

Raphael from Baldur’s Gate 3.